For the weary Warrior Mama

I’ve been hanging out it groups for Adoptive Parents for a few years now, and I have learned so much from other Warrior Mamas and Papas along this journey to hearing my son’s heart. It has been a long, slow process, but with so much to celebrate! My boy used to be a terrified child who used rage and violence to cope with the psychological damage of early childhood trauma. Now most of the time he is a connected, and controlled teenager who knows how to use coping skills appropriately when life becomes too overwhelming for him. I’m so thankful to the great wisdom and teachings of adoption professionals and fellow parents that have supported me through some of the darkest times of my life. I’ve also done my best to share wisdom along the way, especially for the parents who have seemingly tried EVERYTHING to help their kids, to no avail. It’s great in THEORY to say we practice “connected parenting”… but what do we actually DO when a child is having her third rage in the same afternoon, destroying everything in the house, hurling hateful insults, and making everyone miserable, scared, and trapped in a home that feels more like a hostage situation than a loving family life? Moms seem to be the ones most hurt and terrified by raging, out-of-control kids and teens who are fighting internal battles by taking them out on the one person who really cares the most. And… I am so discouraged to read reports of adoption dissolutions or kids who end up in a cycle of never-ending inpatient treatment or long-term residential care. Because there are SO many moms out there who seem so lost, confused, and desperate for solutions, I have made a decision. It’s time for me to step up and do what I can to help. I started this blog and newsletter as a way to share my own struggles and successes, but as a long-time educator and someone who really cares about families, there is much more that I can do. Recently, some parents have asked me to get a little more hands-on in providing support and encouragement through phone conversations and emails.   At first, I was reluctant… thinking to myself “Who am I to offer wisdom and advice to other parents?” As I have talked with parents on the phone about their struggles, though, I am realizing that there are just so many basic parenting and teaching principles that are incredibly hard to implement in the real-world trenches.   Everyone needs someone to talk to as they are dealing with situations at home that seem almost impossible to overcome. So…. I have a big announcement to make…. Many of you know that I have been doing work as a Life & Career Design Coach through my company, WingBuilder for the past few years.  I love the process of helping people design lives and careers or businesses that align with their deepest values and passions. This year, I have decided to offer a limited number of slots to my coaching practice for Post-Adoptive Parent Coaching, with a focus on working with older kids and teens.  I will also work with families as an Educational Consultant, helping them navigate the difficult process of working with schools to design a program that meets the needs of a student with early childhood trauma. I will bring my training as a Professional Certified Coach and Certified Compassion Fatigue Educator, my 25+ years of experience as a Teacher and Educational Leader, and my in-the trenches wisdom as an adoptive Warrior Mama to provide individual support for other weary, desperate Warrior Mamas. My years of experience teaching English as a Second Language and personal experience with international adoption will be especially helpful to parents of kids who were adopted internationally and are learning to build a positive identity while also learning a new language and culture. ———————– Want information on how to become a Trauma-Informed Specialist, Educational Trainer, or Parent Coach?  Check out our Trauma-Informed Specialist Certification Program. Thanks, and have a wonderful week!